As grandparents, it can be difficult to know where to draw the line when it comes to offering support and setting boundaries with your adult children. This is especially true if one of them is struggling with addiction. In this situation, it is important to establish clear boundaries between yourself and your child. Having these boundaries in place is essential to the relationship with your child. Because of this complicated situation, at times you will also need to set boundaries with your grandchildren. This article discusses how to handle this dynamic and the importance of receiving help.
The Reality of Addiction
Unfortunately, the opioid epidemic has had a devastating impact on families across the United States. Grandparents are increasingly being called upon to step up and provide care for their grandchildren due to their adult child’s addiction. According to the Clinical Child and Family Psychology Review, over two million grandchildren are being raised primarily by their grandparents. When parents struggle with addiction, grandparents may find themselves in a tough position. This can include having to provide financial, emotional, and practical support for the grandchild.
It can be difficult for grandparents to navigate their feelings towards their children who are struggling with addiction while still providing support for the grandchild. Grandparents often have to step in to meet basic needs such as food, shelter, and clothing. In addition, grandparents may find themselves struggling with the emotional burden of caring for a grandchild whose parents are in the grips of addiction.
Drawing Boundaries
When a child’s parent exhibits symptoms of addiction, it can grow to the point where it can endanger their lives. This is particularly concerning when it comes to grandchildren. As a grandparent, you can recognize signs of substance abuse. When you recognize the signs of addiction, it is important to talk to your children about the situation. You must be honest in voicing your concerns. Do not be afraid to draw boundaries between yourself and your children.
For example, if your child will not try to get help, you may need to increase contact with your grandchild, while maintaining distance from your child. By drawing these boundaries, you are helping both your child and grandchild get what they need and deserve. While this may lead to your providing primary care for your grandchild, it is necessary as it secures their safety for them. This can be a necessary wake-up call for your child with an addiction.
At times like these, it is important to remember that you love and care deeply about both your children and grandchildren. Drawing boundaries can be difficult, but it is ultimately done out of love and concern. With strong boundaries in place, you are supporting both your child and grandchild in their journey toward healing.
Taking Next Steps
When a child’s parent is battling addiction, it can be difficult to know how to respond and what role you should play as a grandparent. Addiction is an isolating illness that often includes feelings of shame, guilt, and fear. As a grandparent, your job is not to replace the parent struggling with addiction but rather to offer unconditional love and support.
Providing a Confidant
According to the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA), children can end up emulating their parent’s substance abuse if they do not openly discuss their complex emotions about the situation. Your grandchild needs someone to talk to and confide in. Having a confidant can provide them with a sense of security and stability. Most importantly, it provides them with a role model to emulate.
Taking a Balanced Approach
You need to remain neutral and consistent in your care for your grandchild. This can be done by creating boundaries that are clear and consistent. Reassure them that even though their parent may not always be available, you will always be there for them.
It is also important to recognize your limits when it comes to providing care for your grandchild. Make sure you create a healthy balance between yourself and your grandchild while allowing them to continue to foster a relationship with their parent when possible.
Reaching Out for Support
If the situation becomes too overwhelming, do not hesitate to reach out for additional support from friends, family members, mental health professionals, or other resources. Remember that as a grandparent, you have an opportunity to provide extra love, guidance, and compassion for your grandchildren. You can use your experience, wisdom, and patience to provide your grandchild with a nurturing environment.
Recognizing Addiction and Taking Action
When you see that your child is struggling with addiction, it is a heartbreaking reality. Knowing that your children may be putting your grandkids at risk can only add to the worry and concern. The best way to help is to contact First Steps Recovery. We are a nationally recognized rehabilitation center for individuals struggling with addiction. Our facility includes several treatment options to help your child get back on their feet. This includes educational resources for families dealing with addiction. Pursuing help for our children is essential for saving their lives. It’s also crucial for the happiness of our grandchildren. There is hope for your family to find wholeness again.
When someone we love is struggling with addiction, it can affect every aspect of their life. Addiction is not only a problem when you are dealing with it, but also when it affects your adult child. Your grandchildren may need extra help. At First Steps Recovery, we see the potential in each of our patients. Our goal is to provide the tools necessary for those struggling with addiction to sever their relationship with substance abuse. This can restore the whole family to health. It requires that patients set clear boundaries and make a decision to be healed from the ravaging disease of addiction. If someone you love is struggling with addiction, please call us at (844) 489-0836.
When someone we love is struggling with addiction, it can affect every aspect of their life. Addiction is not only a problem when you are dealing with it, but also when it affects your adult child. Your grandchildren may need extra help. At First Steps Recovery, we see the potential in each of our patients. Our goal is to provide the tools necessary for those struggling with addiction to sever their relationship with substance abuse. This can restore the whole family to health. It requires that patients set clear boundaries and make a decision to be healed from the ravaging disease of addiction. If someone you love is struggling with addiction, please call us at (844) 489-0836.
